Greetings Earthlings!

I am Beverly Kho living in North side, Manila.
My name means "Woman from the beaver meadow" which explains why I look like this.
I have once lived with Anne Frank back in the 1930's. I am allergic to powder and as a result, I have never felt non-sticky.
I have my own river named 'Emotion'. I have once felt isolated from this world and tried to fit in with the Egyptians.

If anybody has anymore questions beyond art, music, duplication, relevance, obsessions, literature,
heartbreak, disillusionment, love, death, the future, confusion, delusions, homosexuals, sleep machines,
mundanes, eco-friendly and vegetarians, please don't Google my name or ask your "friend who knows about me".
Call me at your Mom's house, I'll be there having a powder party.

Ok, enough about that. As you can see, this blog is filled with Incubus that's because
I AM a big big fan of them. I look up to them and they serve as my inspiration (Sometimes my distraction. Hi Brandon)

Besides BB and Incubus, I enjoy the sights of...

Oh, and by the way, if your not using Mozilla Firefox, you won't be able to view my posts.



"The world is a drought when out of love
Please come back to us
You're all of the above
I'm making a choice to be out of touch
Leave me be he said, he said, he said,
Leave me here in my stark, raving, sick, sad little world!"

"We're both aligned in framed of mind but circumstance has got us good
And now you’re seeing a side of me I wished no one ever would
Yeah, if it's right to pick a fight, we’re fingers in a sugar bowl
Love isn’t perfect, even diamonds start out as coal"

"Should I apologize
If what I say burns your ears and stains your eyes?
Oh, did I crack your shell?
When it falls away, you'll see we exist as well!"

"I suggest we learn to love ourselves before it's made illegal
When will we learn? When will we change?
Just in time to see it all come down..."

"Was it something I said
Something I read and manifested that's getting you down
Don't you dare come to bed with that ambiguous look in your eye
I'd sooner sleep by an open fire and wake up fried"

"There's something about the look in your eyes
Something I noticed when the light was just right
It reminded me twice that I was alive
And it reminded me that you're so worth the fight"

"Could there be a familiar ring every time I sing about.
Cycle the tears everything in life no doubt I, I.
Reiterate till my jaw is offset,
But I'll say it again anyway,
What you give is what you get!"

"I take a look around; it´s evident the scene has changed.
And there are times when I feel improved, improved upon the past.
Then there are times when I can´t seem to understand at all
and yes it seems as though I´m goin nowhere...
really fucking fast, nowhere fast."

"I'm thinking of my soul severity
And I know everything you hate in me
Fill me up with over-pious badgerate
Throw them up; one of my favorite things"

"I hear you on the radio
You permeate my screen, its' unkind but
If I met you in a scissor fight
I'd cut off both your wings on principle alone"

"Hello!? I'm trying to focus
But my eyes deceive me.
Focus. I'm witnessing history...repeating."

"Picture the scene, where whatever you thought,
would, in the blink of an eye, manifest and become illustrated.
You'd be sure man that every line drawn reflected a life that you loved
not an existence that you hated.
So, must we demonstrate that we can't get it straight?
We've painted a picture, now we're drowning in the paint.
Let's figure out what the fuck it's about,
before the picture we painted chews us up and spits us out."

"There'd be no one to answer to
and complicate our lives,
we could be
the epitome of self sufficience."

"It isn't fair to mention, but it awes the crowd
Your fictional, plastic alibi
So take another hit, steal another line
Did you ever meet a leech who was good at goodbyes?"

"In my fantasy, I’m a Pantomime
I'll just move my hands and everyone sees what I mean
Words are too messy, and it’s way past time
To end in my mouth paint my face white and tried
To reinvent the sea, one wave a time
Speak without my voice and see the world by candlelight"

"I saw you standing in my headlights
I thought I’d run you down for the weight you left on me
Instead I punched rewind, reversed and drove away
And seeing you disappear in my rear view
brought to me the word 'reciprocity'"

"You stare at me like I'm a vitamin.
On the surface you hate,
but you know you need me.
I come dressed as any pill you deem fit.
Whatever helps you swallow the truth
all the more easily"

"My secret arsenal
is an infinite, ageless inkwell
it's a fountian of youth
and a patriot's weapon of choice."

"Enough bowing down to disillusion
Hats off and applause to rogues and evolution
The ripple effect is too good not to mention
If you're not affected, you’re not paying attention
It's too good, it's too good, not to have an effect"

"I see you in line, dragging your feet
you have my sympathy.
The day you were born, you were born free.
That is your privilege."

"Mend this careless thread, it's gone askew
(Thread on my sweater is pendulous, step back and pull it
Watch it unravel faster than a speeding bullet)"

"I'm at the end of my report again
For those who won't do apathy
You had the perfect opportunity
But plead the fifth and walked away"

"What if I was just dreaming? What if I lived in a pear?
What if I had a mustard drenched cucumber tied to my leg."

"Disconnect and let me drift until my upside down is right side in
Society must let the artist go to wander off into the nebula"

"Two weeks without my lover,
I'm in this boat alone
Floating down a river named Emotion
Will I make it back to shore or drift into the unknown."

"If this is right, I'd rather be wrong.
If this is sight, I'd rather be blind."

"Out of line, and indivisible
A crow left of the murder
Every piece contains a map of it all"

"You came, you saw, you conquered...everyone
And I'm left here guessing
Oh what went wrong"

"Kiss the sand goodbye because
the tide is coming up and in
yeah, water, water, water everywhere
and every chance to sink!"

"High fives to a better judgment
By saying less today, I will gain more
Low twos to you my fickle friend
Who brought the art of silent war"

"Some people fall in love and touch the sky
Some people fall in love and find quicksand
I hover somewhere in between
I swear…
I can’t make up my mind."

"Wake up everyone
How can you sleep at a time like this
Unless the dreamer is the real you
Listen to your voice
The one that tells you to taste past the tip of your tongue
Leap and the net will appear."

"I dream
that someday we'll be able to look back
on this together and say
It was for the best and that it
made us stronger today."

"All of my life
Where have you been
I wonder if I'll ever see you again
And if that day comes
I know we could win
I wonder if I'll ever see you again."

"He said Hey Sister.
It’s really really nice to meet ya.
I just met this 5 foot 7 guy who’s just my type.
I like the way he’s speaking his confidence is peaking.
Don’t like his baggy jeans but Imma like what’s underneath it.
And no I aint been to MIA
I heard that Cali never rains and New York heart awaits.
First let’s see the west end.
I’ll show you to my bridrens.
I’m likin' this American Boy. American Boy."

"You better think fast, think fast
'Cause you never know what's coming round the bend.
You better not blink, or breathe.
For consequence is a bigger word than you think."

"Put down your hollow tips
And kiss your lover's lips
And know that fate is what you make of it."

"'Cause' what I want
and what I need
is and will always be free."





Tuesday, March 11, 2008 ' 4:54 PM
I start my day thinking about what I've thrown away...

Well, except for...scroll down to find out.

INCUBUS Pacific Rim Tour live in Manila! March 9, 2008

It has been 2 days since the concert and I still can't get over it! and why do I feel so unaccomplished? Maybe because there were things that I was really confident about but then It didn't push through. That's ok, It was God's decision.

So, Mara stopped by here at our condo. We just hanged-out and did some random stuff. We were waiting for Kuya Pao to come. Then finally! haha. We arrived at Araneta at 7:30 pm I think. Muntik na ma-confiscate yung pro cam ni Mara. Good thing she came up with a plan. So we got in. I saw a lot of familiar faces. I saw Paulo! I was calling him! He was at row B and I was at row E, likod niya kami. Me and Mara was thinking of plans on how we could get to the barricade. So she came up with a plan. Hiramin ko daw yung tickets ni Paulo then pakita namin sa bouncer para i-guide kami, kunwari samin yun. Then di ma-gets ni Pau and isang ticket lang pinahiram niya. So I did the plan nga. I borrowed the ticket and showed it to the bouncer. Rows A and B are allowed at the barricade so I went to the barricade beside me was Anne Curtis and Sam Milby. Great. Then Mara couldn't think of a plan coz ayaw na ipahiram ni Pau yung isang ticket so I went back and talked to the bouncer and I was asking him questions na paulit-ulit kunwari di ko nagegets so that Mara could sneak in. Pero di niya nagawa as in ang tagal ko nang kinakausap yung bouncer.

*Sorry Pau! Favorite mo Updharmadown and di mo na-enjoy coz I was bugging you. I feel so guilty. Nagsisisi tuloy ako. Really sorry Pau!!*

So, bumalik na ko sa barricade but ibang side na. Then eto na, the best part.

Am-boy: "Excuse me miss, where's your ticket?"
Me: "It's there with my friend."
Am-boy: *took care with some fighting business he had with a random girl* (dunno why)
Am-boy: *calls* "Hello Mom? There are a lot of fucking people going here in front..." *blah blah blah* (spoiled brat)

Then he got back at me.

Amboy: *taps me on the shoulder* "Miss miss, can I see your ticket?"
Me: "It's with my friend ok?!"
Amboy: "Miss miss.."
Me: "Will you stop bugging me?!!"
Amboy: "Ah." *calls the bouncer*
Me: *talks to his friend* "Can you please tell your fucking friend to leave me alone?! I paid ten thousand for this and this is what I get?!" (not true. haha)
Oh-so-generous-friend: "Ok, I will, I will. Chill chill.

A bouncer approaches me together with the amboy.
Bouncer: "Miss, pede makita ticket niyo?"
Me: "It's with my friend."
Bouncer: "Ah, hindi po yung friend mo hinahanap namin."
Me: "Fuckers." *Pushes the amboy to the spot that he wanted.*

Wala na, pahiya na ko ano pa ba magagawa ko? haha.

I went back to my seat in row E. I was so ashamed. haha. I told Mara all about it. I told her this amboy wearing blue shirt blah blah. Then she pointed, "Yan ba? sa tabi mo?" Kinabahan ako but it was not him sobrang sakto lang sila nang suot. haha!
She got hurt coz she thought that I have no plans in coming back for her. But I did! my plan was to get her when the show starts.

The soundman keeps on teasing us, parang is-stop niya yung oldies music na nagp-play then sigawan ang audience kasi kala nila start na then ibabalik ulit. haha.

Finally, the lights were turned off! Sigawan! I went one row ahead which is row D, I was standing at this guy's chair. Buti nalang sobrang bait niya. Then biglang labas sina Jose, Kilmore, and Ben then Mike, then Brandon. I was shaking the two guys in front of me (yung owner nung chair) haha! Di ko napapansin eh. They started playing "Quicksand" and I cried, seriously! haha. I couldn't help it. My favorite band in the whole entire world who I thought na makikita ko lang sa pictures at sa Youtube o maririnig ko lang sa I-pod ko is actually playing live! Right in front of me! haha.

Super sigaw ako, kung ano ano sinisigaw ko. Pag tatahimik saka ako sisigaw eh. haha. I was shouting "I LOVE YOU BRANDON!!" basta lahat sila na- I love you ko. Sumigaw pa ko, "MARRY ME MIKE!" habang nagso-solo siya sa "Sick, Sad, Little World"

Sobrang kahit andiyan na sila sa harap ko, feeling ko untouchable parin sila. Siguro nalang kung nasa barricade ako, yun, mafe-feel ko talaga. But hindi eh, thanks alot to Mr. Amboy.

My favorite part was yung nag-topless si Brandon sa "Sick, Sad, Little World", tied his hair, then uminom ng water then he spitted it out up in the air! Sobrang HOT! I seriously fell down in my chair when he went topless. haha. Basta all throughot the show I was screaming, dancing, singing, basta lahat na.

Pinaka nagwala ako, nung plinay nila, "Vitamin", "Favorite Things", "Sick, Sad, Little World" and "Circles". I was shouting, "PRIVILEGE!" I badly wanted them to play that song o kaya "Rogues".

They all left quietly, kala nung iba tapos na but I knew they'd come back for an encore. Everybody was shouting, "MORE!" "INCUBUS INCUBUS!" "ENCORE!!" So they came back and played "Stellar" then "Circles" then last song, "Aqueous Transmission"

Kung napanuod niyo yung Look Alive DVD, you'll see the similarity. Lalo na sa exit, "Aqueous Transmission" was playing, una exit si Brandon, then Ben (he even lifted his bass up! Parang talaga sa LA DVD), then Jose (threw his drum sticks), then Kilmore exited while Mike was throwing picks. I wanted a pick so badly!

After the concert we called Kuya Harley kaagad kasi nga..basta read my March 8 post. Too bad nakaalis na daw sila. Pero I wanted to go to Crowne Plaza pa just in case maabutan sila. But ayaw na ng bro ko. So we went to Jolibee The Fort and guess what? andun yung friends ni Amboy. Super tingin sila sakin. haha. Then pagtingin ko sa window I saw a blue shirt. Natatakpan ng poster yung face niya. So sabi ko sa bro ko lipat kami ng table. Plano ko na nga to do the finger at him but pag labas namin di pala siya yun. haha.

Habang nasa Jolibee, di pa ako nakuntento and I called Kuya Harley.

Me: "Hello, Kuya Harley? Asan na sila?"
Harley: "Nadito sa kwarto."
Me: "Ah, hindi pa sila pupunta ng Hong Kong?"
Harley: "Di pa, bukas pa."
Me: "So diyan sila matutulog?"
Harley: "hahahaha. Malamang."
Me: "Kung pupunta ba kami diyan, may chance ba na makausap ko sila or anything?"
Harley: "ah, wala wala."
Me: "Nabigay mo na yung gifts?"
Harley: "Ngayon palang, kanino nga ulit yung 2 na nakabalot in blue?"
Me: "Kay Brandon yan."
Me: "Di sila aalis? kasi diba kahapon sabi mo nag-Timog sila?"
Harley: "Ah, di ko pa alam, sige tawag ka ulit may gingawa pa ko."

Memorize ko talaga eh noh?

Went home, weird ng feeling super, parang masaya na unacomplished. Basta. I didn't have time to study for my exams tomorrow so naisip ko sa car nalang.

Kinabukasan, I called Kuya Harley again, mga 7am. (here I go again. haha)

Me: "Hello Kuya? Sorry sorry, ako ulit."
Harley: "Huh? bakit?"
Me: "What time sila aalis?"
Harley: "Mga 8:30 am."
Me: "Nabigay mo na?"
Harley: "Ah, oo. Binigay ko dun sa naka-braided (haha), si Chris."
Me: "Ah, talaga???? ano reaction niya???"
Harley: "Wala, kinuha lang niya."
Me: "Ah, ok. Thanks super! Kuya! Bye!"

Ang pangit talaga ng feeling! Super unaccomplished. haha. Mashado kasi ako nag-expect ng mga bagay bagay. Pero ok lang, sabi ko nga, Yan ang gusto mangyari ni God kaya accept ko nalang.


Pictures are courtesy of Mara Lopez Yokohama. Thanks Mara!


signature.jpg (image)